Thirty Days of Utterly Ridiculous

Reviewer says "No Thanks"

By: Peter J. Vizzini

Posted: 3/19/08

If you like horror movies, do not rent or even bother to see Thirty Days of Night. This is a movie based on a graphic novel, very much like Sin City, except where the film version of Sin City did the graphic novel justice, this did the exact opposite. It was a ruination of the graphic novel.
I went into the video store thinking I was going to be receiving a good scare later on. I was wrong. Thirty Days of Night starts off in typical horror fashion...slow to get started and then "BAM" someone is brutally murdered by a "something". Unfortunately, the producers went all out in the beginning and showed the audience what exactly was doing the killing, which ruins the suspense factor for the rest of the movie. I am not going to even get into the horrible plot of this movie. Suffice it to say, the old line of "if you put monkeys into a room, they will eventually come up with Shakespeare" fits quite well except this was most definitely not Shakespeare. It may have been written by monkeys though, based upon the plot.
This is a breakdown of the plot...someone dies, meaningless dialog, someone dies again and then more meaningless dialog, credits roll and the audience is questioning whether that was their I.Q. that hit the floor or the projectionist dying of laughter at the futile stupidity of this movie. Also if you are squeamish, do not even think about watching this movie, I have seen less blood in a slaughterhouse. Overall I would have to say this has to be one of the worst movies I have ever had the infinite discomfort of sitting down to watch. I give this load of mindlessly meaningless junk one out of four stars and no thumbs.....period. A five year old could have written a better movie.